{"id":602,"date":"2012-07-19T16:25:47","date_gmt":"2012-07-19T22:25:47","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.denverpsychiatry.com\/?p=602"},"modified":"2012-10-29T12:57:06","modified_gmt":"2012-10-29T18:57:06","slug":"red-hot-and-angry","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.denverpsychiatry.com\/red-hot-and-angry\/","title":{"rendered":"Red Hot and Angry"},"content":{"rendered":"

\u201c<\/strong>We are all slaves of our own actions.\u00a0 Why be angry with anybody else?\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Shantidera<\/em><\/p>\n

Most of us will only get to revel in the hot-dog grilling, canonball jumping delights of summer about 80 times in our lives.\u00a0 Let\u2019s face it, of those 80 times, the first few summers don\u2019t really count and certainly the last few, wearing sweaters in 90 degree heat, only partly count.<\/p>\n

This has been a particularly hot and dry summer and the color red comes to mind as a way to describe it.\u00a0 Red symbolizes heat and fire, but it also symbolizes anger.\u00a0 The \u201cdog days\u201d of summer are not supposed to hit until at least late July.\u00a0 I would bet my flip flops and barbeque tongs that this summer has brought more of an edgy, angry feeling than the usual joy of s\u2019mores at the campfire and goofy poolside antics.\u00a0 Why not?\u00a0 It has been in the \u201cred\u201d most of the time for the last 2 months.\u00a0\u00a0 Even my sunburns have sunburns.<\/p>\n

It seems a good time to focus on how to manage anger.\u00a0 Anger is a normal emotion; it is one that you are supposed to have at times.\u00a0\u00a0 For example, you should be angry if all your popsicles melted before you got to the park and the only way to cool off was by dipping your head under the Slurpee machine.\u00a0\u00a0 The way you feel is the way you feel and it is important to accept that.<\/p>\n

The next step in anger management is to ask yourself what you will do about feeling angry or irritable.\u00a0 If you are in the car, you can choose to yell at the guy in front of you with his turn signal on for the last three miles or you can tell your spouse that you hate the way he or she chews the Cheerios.\u00a0 My guess is that those strategies will not actually reduce how angry you feel.<\/p>\n

One of the first things that can help is to learn to take deep breaths.\u00a0\u00a0 It is impossible to yell at somebody if you are breathing in.\u00a0 The deep breath can help you feel calmer almost immediately.\u00a0 This is important because one of the problems with anger is that it makes people impulsive, irrational; break things or say hurtful things.<\/p>\n

For good deep breathing, take three breaths in a row at a slow even pace.\u00a0 Focus on good posture with back straight, and shoulders back.\u00a0\u00a0 It should take about 12 seconds.\u00a0 Then ask yourself if you feel calmer, if not, repeat the exercise.\u00a0 Often, as you do this, you will feel more mindful.\u00a0 In other words, you will be more present, realize that whatever the situation is it will be better handled calmly.\u00a0 You may realize it\u2019s not as bad as you thought any way.\u00a0 It feels good to be present and anger has a nasty habit of making you time travel; mad about what happened or what you think will happen.<\/p>\n

Additionally, you will benefit by using imagery; picture yourself corralling your anger in a stable filled with ice and snow.\u00a0 See yourself being calm and you in control of anger, not anger in control of you.\u00a0 You can listen to music you like or concentrate on a good memory.\u00a0 Also, pick your battles.\u00a0 There are some things that simply don\u2019t deserve your anger; you have better things to do with your time and energy.<\/p>\n

Always take time to step back and think.\u00a0 You will realize that maintaining anger at the current situation in life will not help but may hinder you.\u00a0 That alone may help your temperature go from \u201cfire-brick red\u201d to a manageable \u201crose-red\u201d.\u00a0 Ultimately, if nothing else works, you can punch a punching bag; it won\u2019t hit back and it is legal to punch.\u00a0 Also, with proper form and hand protection, it is a great work-out.\u00a0 Exercise is a terrific way to cool off anger.<\/p>\n

I guarantee that it will get cold again in Denver.\u00a0 Nothing lasts forever and you only have so many summers to enjoy in life.\u00a0 With that in mind, remember that it is still summer, it may be scorching out there, but there are still flowers and you may still stop and smell those flowers.\u00a0 Or you can just stomp on them.\u00a0 Which option sounds better?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

\u201cWe are all slaves of our own actions.\u00a0 Why be angry with anybody else?\u201d \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Shantidera Most of us will only get to revel in the hot-dog grilling, canonball jumping delights of summer about 80 times in our lives.\u00a0 Let\u2019s face it, of those 80 times, the first few summers don\u2019t really count and certainly […]\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[3],"tags":[],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.denverpsychiatry.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/602"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.denverpsychiatry.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.denverpsychiatry.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.denverpsychiatry.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.denverpsychiatry.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=602"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.denverpsychiatry.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/602\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.denverpsychiatry.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=602"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.denverpsychiatry.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=602"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.denverpsychiatry.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=602"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}